Sibling Rivalry


Sibling Rivalry! Yes, that word! It’s something a mom never wants to see or hear. We love our children with an equal passion whether we have one, two or seven we want them to get along, be best friends.

Wow! I sipped the cool-aid and my glasses turned a shade of rose. Taking glasses off!

The true reality was my five children fought, they compared each other, they pushed at each other, they didn’t even like each other some days, they thought I had a favorite. Not true! Their little minds saw things differently, so I gave them space to figure it out. I stepped back and watched how these conflicts played out, making sure they didn’t hurt each other. I knew this had to be part of a healthy growing experience. When they argued, I told them to figure out how to be nice to each other, apologize when things got too heated. I taught them to respect and love each other. This was their tribe, they needed to have each other’s back, to this day they really do have each other’s back!

Reflecting on those years makes me smile. They are amazing adults now because I gave them a safe space to be kids, to do crazy kid things, we had a creek running through our property and often on those hot summer days I could hear them splashing around down in the creek catching crayfish and getting dirty. They built forts in the woods, when it rained I allowed them to mess up the basement to their hearts content. I also gave them chores and taught them the importance of a good work ethic  I went about my daily work happy, because they were growing, learning, playing and yes even fighting together.

You moms out there who are struggling to make sense of the conflicts, who just want one minute of peace, to go have a bathroom break without the door coming off it’s hinges, to get dressed up and go have a nice dinner with your husband without freaking out wondering if your little ones are OK without you. They will be OK, you will be OK. Take a few deep breaths and if that fails, maybe a shot of brandy might do the trick. Find your inner strength, grab onto it and hold on for the best, most fierce, mind blowing ride of your life. That fast paced merry-go-round called motherhood. It is the best ride you will ever ride!